hell yes lets make some ravioli
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
