for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
How does it feel to date your dad?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
