Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
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