Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
