I'm laying in your front yard are you home
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
All the doctor said was why
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
