Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
