Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize