i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
