so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
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