I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
