The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Randomize
