do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
