yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
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