Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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