I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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