If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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