Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
