The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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