we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
