I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
