omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
