Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
