Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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