You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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