there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
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