i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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