GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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