Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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