It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
