escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Randomize
