i just wanna soil my oats bro
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Randomize
