you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
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