yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Randomize
