windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
