like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize