remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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