im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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