i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize