i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
