you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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