woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
