I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
