i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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