Hey man sorry I got all grabby
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
