Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
