Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
