I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Bring me that man meat
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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