At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
