i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
