he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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