: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Randomize
