He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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