she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize